Eight years ago today..

At 9:30am I had been in labor for 13 hours...all night long. Up until that point I had made it without even thinking about the possibility of using any pain medicine...but was getting so tired that I was willing to try anything. I had only dilated to a 3 and was a bit discouraged. My doctor suggested using a bit of Nubaine and although I was hesitant, I was also desperate..so I went ahead with it. The meds didn't work like I thought they were going to. It didn't take away any of the pain...but it sure did make me sleep in between the contractions! I still remember the feeling quite clearly. It felt like I was sleeping for hours..when in reality it was only a matter of about 2 minutes. I remember waking from the sleep as a contraction would come on..and I would call Josh over to me (who at that point would sit down while I slept) and he would hold my hand through yet another contraction, and then give me a sip of my water.

I dilated very quickly from that point and was complete by 11 something. I had no idea that pushing her out was going to take 3 more hours! I remember my doc saying something to the effect of "it must be a girl, because she's being so stubborn". I didn't believe him for a second, I thought sure it was a boy baby in my belly. Finally after trying every trick in the book in addition to some contortionism (and a threat of a potential C-Section)...Jessalyn was born. 2:15 on a Sunday afternoon, 7lbs 3oz and 19.5 inches long...head circumference 97th percentile.

She was perfect. I could NOT believe she was a girl. She got 9 and 9 on her apgars and has been healthy ever since. I do think I was in a bit of shock after her birth..but I was sure that I loved her more than anything I had ever loved before. I remember the first night in the hospital. I had opted that the nurses take her so that I could sleep without worrying...but I could hear her crying and crying. The nurses finally gave up and brought her to me.

I remember it so clearly. Josh was sleeping. Jessalyn was wearing the little white t-shirt that they gave her at birth, a diaper..and the white socks that I brought with me from home. She was so tiny...and fuzzy...and soft and warm. I laid her on my chest while I was partially sitting up in the hospital bed and she stopped crying. She slept there with me so quietly for the rest of the night. It was then that I realized that she wanted ME. She didn't want to eat, didn't need her diaper changed, wasn't uncomfortable...she just wanted to be with me. It was awesome and scary all at the same time.

Bringing her home changed me in ways that I can't even describe. She continues to teach me. She paves the way..literally..for everyone else in the family. She undoubtedly has the hardest job, but so far seems to be taking her job quite well.

Jessalyn is 8 now. She is happy, smart, responsible, loving....she is so many things. She is a good girl.

She was able to celebrate her 8th birthday with 5 of her school friends..two of which slept over. They had a great time being girls.





She then was able to celebrate (along with Luke) with the family..and again, had a great time.







This morning I tried to surprise her with breakfast in bed...but I think she heard me and came down stairs. I told her what I was doing...so she went back to bed and pretended to be sleeping..and then pretended to be surprised with her breakfast! Tonight she will get to choose what to have for dinner. I'm trying to send her subliminal messages....phujee, phujee, phujee:) We'll see. (Luke chose Mc.D's for his birthday dinner so anything should be better than that!).



I am blessed to have Jessalyn as my only daughter.
Happy Birthday Jessalyn Alayna!

I can't believe it has been a year already.

I just went back to last years post about Luke's birthday. Looking at the pictures of his 3rd birthday party made it seem like it was just yesterday! Funny though...that his 3rd birthday party pictures look much like his 4th birthday party pictures!

We had a nice little party on Sunday and celebrated with the usual crowd of people. We celebrated both Jessalyn and Luke's birthdays together with the fam...Nana, Granny, Papa, Great Nana, Shara, Kirsten, Jake, Paul and Dona-Lynn. It was a nice time and Luke was very happy. He opened many gifts and loved every single one of them! It was sweet because when he opened his Optimus Prime toy I told him that it was from Jake and Shara and he was confused and said "but I want one of my own". He thought I meant that it was FOR Jake and Shara:) He opened another light saber (the green one, as requested), a new Leapster game (Star Wars), three Lego sets (Star Wars), a new board game (Star Wars). Seeing a pattern here?







I would say that at age four Luke is most definitely into Star Wars above anything else, although he loves any type of super hero character. This summer he mastered riding his bike without training wheels. He looks so little. He is starting to ride standing up and giving his mother even more gray hair.

He's still just as competitive as ever. If he loses, watch out! If he wants the ball..he's gonna get the ball. He is intense. We try to embrace his intensity..instead of trying to change it. We believe that if we can continue to 'channel' his personality in the right direction that he will be an amazing man one day.



He's the one that will try anything. He definitely likes to go to the extreme with everything he does. He is will to try mostly any food as well. He LOVES spicy stuff. His first question about anything is "is it spicy?" and he is hoping that it is. We have yet to find a chip that is too spicy. He loves his "spicy gum". His newest favorite thing is to get banana peppers from Subway. He loves them.



We have learned that no matter how mad he is if you say the word "wedgie" it makes him laugh. He can't not laugh when you say it. He thinks its even funnier when Daddy says it. He is totally 'boy'...I am forever telling him not to make himself burp at the table and thinks its hilarious when he 'toots'. He has figured out how to snap his fingers, crack his knuckles and wipe his own butt! (life lessons:)

One of his favorite things to do is to walk up to you and say "Ya know what?" waits for you to answer with "what?" and then he says "Nuffin." (giggle giggle giggle). Its even gone as far as he says "ya know what? I'm not gonna say 'nuffin'." waits for the "what?" and then finishes with "nuffin". Its too cute!

Luke and I have been enjoying our afternoon's together while J and E are in school and while Owen naps. I have learned some things about him that I didn't know. He doesn't like to be alone. If I go upstairs, he goes upstairs. If I go to the kitchen, he goes to the kitchen..and so on. He likes to be right with me the whole time. I suppose this makes sense, since his entire life has involved siblings by his side.

I can't believe he is 4!
Happy Birthday Lukie!!

"Get whatever I want Day"

Today is my birthday! 31 years. I'm not just "thirty" I'm "in my thirties"...it sounds weird. Its weird for me to think that I have a brother who is 41 and one who is 39. Old.

I'm not one of those people who hides from their birthday. I get that from my dad I think. My dad, who died of cancer 10 years ago at age 60, was infamous for talking up his birthday. It didn't matter what age he was...people were NOT going to forget his birthday, September 23rd. He was the guy that on Sept. 24th would remind everyone that there were only 364 days left until his next birthday. He was funny about it. He was very sick in the hospital on his 60th birthday (only about a month before his death) and we still celebrated it. Not only was he turning 60...but he was turning 60 and about to die. He still was happy to celebrate. I remember the day very clearly.

So of course, I do complain a bit (or maybe a lot) about turning 31...but I will never dread my birthday. I liked my dad's attitude about life and he really was one to just embrace it.

I also am not one of those people who expect the world to stop on my birthday. I honestly and truly don't expect that I be thrown a party or be given gifts or cards. I don't really expect the day to run much differently than every other day...but somewhere, somehow...Josh and I started implementing the "get whatever I want" idea for each others birthdays.

You see, "get whatever I want" comes within reason. I mean, I can't go tell Josh that I want a new car and expect that. Obviously..that's not happening. "Get whatever I want" is more like anything that is possible for Josh to do for me in the 24 hour span of my birthday he will do it..and do it happily. Same goes for him on his birthday. So in other words...if I want him to give the kids a bath tonight he will. If I want him to do the dishes, he will. If I want him to go get me pizza for dinner he will. If I want him to cook me dinner he will. If I want him to rub my feet he will. We jokingly watch the clock real closely. Like last night...we were joking because it was 11:20 and I was trying to keep him awake on the couch so that I could get a foot rub before going to bed. Its 24 hours:)

The thing that is kind of funny is that everyday is really a "get whatever I want day" because I have the best husband EVER. There is nothing in the above paragraph that I would get if I asked for it...even if it wasn't Oct 22nd. There's just something about it being "get whatever I want day" that makes me feel fine about asking..and about asking for all of those things in one day! I mean..it is all about me today, right?

Unfortunately, I have a husband who works long days and will be gone most of the day...but I assure you, I will pack as much "get whatever I want" into the few hours that we have when he's home tonight!

I strongly suggest that everyone implement "get whatever I want day". It works well all around. Just remember...it will be your turn to "give whatever he/she wants" at some point down the road!

Fall Portraits

I took the boys out in an attempt to get some decent fall photos. I was trying to get something specifically to replace last years pictures that are in frames in my living room. Overall I was pretty happy with the results. I have a ton of pictures..but I will narrow it down to just a few of each kid.

Jessalyn was in school during this photo shoot, but I have plans to take her out very soon!

Ethan











Lucas











Owen









This pretty much sums up his attitude towards getting pictures taken..



A few attempts at pictures together...

I shouldn't even be able to call myself a fan.

I just woke up to find out that, after I had completely and totally given up hope on the Red Sox, they came back in the 7th inning to WIN the game. Although I am extremely happy that this happened I feel like the biggest loser. Its not like us (as in, the Brown family) to give up hope on any of our teams..but we certainly did last night.

The Sox deserve an apology from me.

I'm Sorry.

What happens when...

...you give your 5 and 4 year old boys a camera.



I only wish you could hear the giggling that was going along with this picture taking fun.

"Ethan (giggle giggle). Take a picture of my butt (giggle giggle)."

And just to add to the antics that I see all day long, this is a picture of the two of them watching the pumpkin on the table to see if it was going to move. They convinced themselves that it was going to grow legs and walk. They decided to turn themselves around during lunch to be sure they didn't miss something.



They make me laugh.

Its October.

I changed my layout a bit...to more of a fall'ish theme, so I figured with that I would go ahead an post a couple of fall'ish pictures. The boys and I went for a short walk..just up the street during a nice day last week. In fact, I think it has rained every day since this particular one.